Her Secret
by Jobeth-S
Summary: Outlaw Queen, EF, During the missing year they very soon developed some kind of a relationship, which is mostly about sex and nothing more. Robin gets worried, bc he thinks Regina is going to be brought down by an illness again, similar to the one she had two months prior, or so he thinks. But Regina has a big secret! Will she tell him?
1. Chapter 1

Hi everyone! I had this idea today, and could't go to sleep before a wrote it down. There will be about two more chapters to this story.

I haven't given up my other story, Wickedness, I plan to post chapter three by the end of this week. So please, be patient! :-)

Here is smut in the second half of this chapter. My first smut, so I hope it doesn't suck. Also the drama is evolving.

Hope you will enjoy!

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-Regina. Regina? - He kept calling for her, but again, she was too deep in her daydreaming. She was lying on her side semi-nude, facing the window, looking through it, most likely mesmerised by the beautiful sundown.

To be honest, the sundown didn't look so bad, though Robin was mesmerised by a quite different view in front of him. He wouldn't complain if he could feast his eyes on her naked body all day and night. They sarted to have sex about on hour ago, so he already had some time to suffice his needs, both visual and sexual. And he was more than satisfied, but it didn't make him want to see her gorgious body any less.

He was supporting his head with one arm bent at the elbow, quite duplicating Regina's position before him. When she hadn't react to his callings, Robin gently put his left hand to her protuding hipbone, and smoothed the sheet down the curve of her ass. This finally gained him some reaction, she turned to him.

- Hey. - He caressed her face, studying her brown orbs. Did he see tears in them? - You okay?

- Of course. - She smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes. She reached behind his neck to pull him down for a kiss, which he gave her gladly, though he separated his lips from hers before the kiss got heated. He was still curious.

- What happened? - He asked, playing with her raven locks.

- Nothing. - She stated, and moved to capture his lips again.

- No! - He got disturbingly serious for Regina's liking. - You have been acting the same as you did two moons ago, before you fell ill. I often find you daydreaming, I feel your bones again when I stroke your chest, you are paler and you started to get distant with me, we hardly met in the past week.

- Oh, so you missed me. - And a vicious grin started to form on her face, her hand reaching between his legs.

- Don't! - He grabbed her hand. - I'm worried about you. - He was searching her eyes to read from them, because he was sure she is not telling something. But what could he do? She was still a mistery to him, because during the time they spent together, they mostly were in bed, or beside the bed, or on a table, or elswhere having mindblowing sex. And when they rarely talked, they ended up throwing nasty comments at eachothers heads, fighting or having sex. This relationship seemed satisfying for them, both of them thought that if it was enough for the other, it would be enough for them too.

- You should't, I'm fine. - Again that smile, trying to convince him. He sighed helplessly.

- Just don't push me away, like you did back than. I accept that you don't want me to tend to you, but I still could visit to chear you up, help you get better.

- You should have had someone while I was sick, maybe keep her instead of me. - She said playfully, though deep inside she was deadly serious. She considered not meeting him ever again, during her illness. At least not as lovers. Was she fooling herself? They weren't even lovers, only fuck buddies. And now, here he was pretending he cared. She wasn't some damsel in distress to be in need of his care, or anyones to be precise.

- I assume, you didn't get it, I'm totally satisfied with you, your majesty. - He smiled, showing his dimples, and she smiled bach at him.

- Of course you are satisfied, thief, why would't you, with the queen, the fairest of them all? - She asked playfully. - You have all night to cherish my royal body.

- And that I will do, my Queen. - He hovered over her and kissed her not so red, but still full lips roughly, pushing his thick tonge right in between, as deep as he could enter her.

All she could do was to moan, while they tonges duelled deep in her mouth. He knew she liked it rough, and he won't disappoint her, not ever. His fingers pinched her nipples a few times, which alone made her crazy.

- I can't get enough of you when your breasts are this sensitive. - She moaned and arched her back, her nipples already rubbed into hard peaks, but that wasn't enough for Robin, he had to taste her, make her wet there too. First he licked thoroughly the right breast, than he continued with the left, each mounds wobbling slightly through his ministrations. She was pantig, her whole body squirming, she was close to coming. If he just touched her between the legs she would come.

- Please, Robin. - He liked it, when she begged, it made him feel like he had her at his mercy. And he really did.

- Yes, my Queen. - He said, because he knew what she needed and he was more than happy to give it to her , after all, he wanted to see her come, to see her loose control, because he liked to believe, that than he could see the real Regina. Though for only some seconds. So he kept on tugging on her nipples with his teeth and left hand, while his right hand reached down, two fingers parting her folds to make wide space for the middle finger, which dipped inside her through wetness.

She cried out, grabbing both the sheet beside her and Robin's short hair. He only had to give her a few strokes, with his thumb pressed hardly to her bundle of nerves. When he felt her tightening around his finger, he added another one as he released her right breast with a wet pop, to be able to watch her closely.

- Look at me. - He whispered. She tried to obey, but her orgasm was too big, too complete. Her thighs were trembling and her pelvis rose from the bed -making it hard for Robin to move his fingers, to help her ride out her climax- as she screamed, open-mouthed, her eyelids fluttering. She managed to keep her focus on Robin, whenever her eyes had focus. Her body was still quivering, she hadn't gained back the control over it, yet. She felt him give her kisses to the corner of her panting mouth, to her cheeks, her jaw and her forehead.

- You are beautiful. - He whispered with dim eyes, slowly rubbing his length to her left tigh. He stroked her neck and arms, giving her time to recover, but she stayed close to limp, except for the shivers which occasionally ran through her.

- Hey. - He tried smiling.

- Hmm. - Was her only answer.

- You okay?

- Will you let me sleep for a few hours? I feel so drained. - She whispered, eyes half closed.

The queen is gone for now, Regina stays a bit longer this time, Robin thought.

- Of course. - And he tucks her in. - You sure you'r okay? - He starts to worry again, it's only 8 pm.

- Mhm.

- I'll bring us dinner, and wake you up in two hours.

- Hm. - She noted and was already asleep.

She never fell asleep this early, expect before she got ill back than, when he feared he would loose her.

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What do you think? Please review! :-)


	2. Chapter 2

Hi everyone! Sorry for the long wait! Unfortunately I won't be able to post frequently, but please be patient. There are at least two more chapters to go.

I forgot to apologise for my english. Sorry, I try to do my best. And I do have a beta, though I couldn't make him to read this, or the previous one, because I don't think he would be able to concentrate on the grammar or spelling. This fic is just too smutty. :) So maybe the mistakes will be corrected later. Hope they aren't distroying the story.

Thank you so much for the many follows and favs! It also felt so good to read the reviews, see some of you guessing what is going to happen. Thank you, each one is really an inspiration.

We continue where we left them. In bed... Angst in the end!

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He was pumping two fingers in and out of her, in a steady pace, twisting them sometimes. His seed leaking out of her all through the process, making his movements easyer.

She was a breathtaking sight, on her hands and knees, just the way she let him take her only minutes ago. And she let him take her hard and fast, because the pure man had waited long enough. And he even brought her the promissed dinner into bed -what a gentleman. Though she couldn't care less about the food as he woke her with his shameless touches.

She glanced back at him every now and then, from the corners of her heavily shadowed eyes, using always too much makeup. Black was her colour, he learned it quite early, and he found it intimidating and sad in the same time. Her long hair was black too, which now covered her left shoulder, falling down along her left side, it's end just reaching the sheets.

She gave him a smirk as she squeezed his fingers, trapping them inside her. Even from her current position, she could make it seem like she was in charge. But Robin wasn't always playing along with her.

He looked at her with raised eyebrows and a playful smile as he pushed in a third finger, roughly. He almost withdrew it instantly, when she turned her head away from him to release a short, sharp cry, and slightly moved away from him, swaying on her knees. He saw her taking a deep breath, head bowed, as his free hand touched her gently between the shoulderblades, her skin warm and shining, body trembling a little. After she adjusted to the thickness, she resumed her previous movements against his fingers.

- Was it too much? - He asked, voice deep, and laced with worry.

- In case you haven't ...mmhh... already noticed, nothing is ...mmhh... too much for me. - She said between low moans, and what she said and how she said it, made Robin shiver uncontrollably. She was right, she never ever complained about what he did to her, but still, he didn't know with witch action will he reach her limits once.

- Than I'll just keep trying. - He managed to say, after releasing a long breath through his nose, his eyes glowing with arousal.

He carressed her back, sliding his left palm along her spine down to her ass, than all the way back to her neck. He went up further to burry his fingers in her hair, and when he found a good grip there, he began to pull her hair painfully, making her elbows straighten as her head and chest rose from the bed. This way bringing her closer to him, in order to hear her moans and shaky breaths better, while he plunged into her from behind with his other hand.

She let him pull her hair. She would let him do to her anything he wanted. She just loved the pain he caused. She needed this pain to stop her other feelings, wanting to surface from her dark and lonely heart. She needed the physical suffering to veil her emotional one.

After a while he released her black locks -too soon for her liking, and leaned forward to place tender kisses behind her ear, than layed his head on the nape of her neck. He confused her with his reappearing tenderness. Not once had she told him, that she didn't need it. But maybe he was the one, who did. He was the one, who felt the need to take care of someone. Not especially her, but someone. A woman, she thought.

He stroked her neck on the front, above her collar bones, than let his -previously violating- hand wonder down between her breasts, also around them, weighting the mounds, but never touching the already erect nipples. Driving her crazy with this neglect.

All this time his right hand keeping it's slow but firm pace -three fingers still burried inside her, though his wrist was starting to ache from the uncomfortable angle.

- I feel you are close. - He whispered into her left ear, his chest hair now scratching the left side of her quivering body.

- Yess... , don't you dare to stop...! - She managed to hiss. He smiled a wicked smile, which she couldn't see of course. No, he won't stop, however he had further plans with his Queen. Starting to act on them, his left hand left behind her chest -nipples still eager for further and firmer touches, and he dipped two fingers into her open mouth. He wasn't surprised, when she immediately started to suck them eagerly.

He pushed his knuckles to the side of her mouth, making her turn her head slightly, and she looked at him, eyes darker than ever. Mesmerised, he pulled the fingers out to hold her face close to his, wet digits flat on her flushed cheek.

- If I didn't know you were a queen, I would think you have quite a different profession to ply a trade, a rather primal one.

- You seem well experinced yourself, too, Thief. - She breathed heavily, with a grin.

Than he kissed her routhly, sliding his tongue inside, and while he moved it in and out of her mouth, he stilled his fingers in her core, making her whimper helplessly against his invading tongue. She was so close, her inner muscles started to quiver. She tried to move, but he hold her in place with his strong arms.

At the same time, he spread his thumb some more from the three unmoving digits, to put it's tip on her other opening, but only after he coated the thick digit with the juces that kept leaking out of her. He circled the puckery surface slowly and she moaned into his mouth. He pushed a little and she moaned again, surprised.

Only a few times did he penetrate her this way, and exclusively when she asked him to. And though it still hurt her, she didn't mind it at all, because she was already deathly close to coming. It was ironic how she got turned on from the same things that have been forced on her more than three decades ago.

Was it even healthy? No, most definitely it wasn't. She had known she was abnormal. She had known she wasn't sane. She had wanted to be happy, for once in her life, before all got out of hands completely. Now she just wanted to pretend to be happy, during that short time they spent together, otherwise continue with her miserable life. This was all what was left for her, and she wouldn't dare to hope for more. Nor would she let him know anything of her sickness, it was easier this way.

For the time being, Robin made her forget her despair. He made her heart rate rise, her mind numb, her body satisfied. He caused her pain, than caressed her aching parts, though she didn't understand why she let him do to her either of those.

When he finally pushed his thumb through, and started to move the three fingers again, she couldn't hold her weight any more and tumbled to her right side. Due to her sudden fall their lips separated from eachother's, however Robin managed to keep his fingers in place, never stopping his movements.

He also managed not to crash her tiny body under his, and after landing beside her, he turned her chest a bit to reach her breasts with his mouth. He attacked them with all he had, licking, nibbing, tugging, lapping the eager nipples. All the while trusting forcefully into both of her hidden openings, filling her compleately, rubbing her so deliciously. He moaned against her mounds contentedly, as she arched her back in response to his ministrations. Soon she started to move against one of his legs with her center, giving also some attention to her sensitive nub, desperate for her release.

- Let it go, Regina! - He whispered, looking up from her heaving chest.

- Robin... - She breathed between moans, her head tossing, eyes closed, her whole body squirming against his, her fingers buried in his hair. She was again at his mercy, and in a strange way she felt safe. It felt right, it felt good in all way. She was floating, she was in heaven.

- That's it. - He said, as he felt her muscles tighten around his fingers, and watched her ride out her waves. Her body stretching like a gracious bow as she cried out her release.

- You are beautiful. - He continued, while she was still shaking, unable to utter any word. After pulling his fingers free, he stroked her back gently, and she lazily snuggled closer to him. He hugged her and kissed her, like lovers do.

She felt him hard against her center and her body shook some more.

- Can I? - He asked looking into her hazy eyes as she nodded. He studied her features till she convinced him with a slight smile.

He grabbed her face with both of his hands, and kissed her deeply, passionately. He pushed her slowly to her back, than finding her entrance with his tip, he guided his member into her.

They both moaned. Because she was incredibly thight. It only took three trusts and he came, too, than collapsed on top of her.

When he got his senses back he slowly sat up beside her, observing her. She was so beautiful, but also so pale and skinny.

She was laying there, looking up at him, eyes almost closed, her mascara smeared a bit, her forehead shining with sweat. As he caressed her clammy skin, he not just saw, but also felt her ribs protruding on her rising chest. He didn't want her to be that sick again. And her hipbones looked the same. Than he saw something else.

- You should have told me, that it hurt. - He looked in her dark eyes, with worry and confusion on his face.

- But it didn't. - She answered, mimicing his confusion.

- You sure? Because you are bleeding. - He gestured to the sheet under her.

- That's ... - She touched her stomack unconsciously, registering the pain, which grew with every orgasm she had this evening. - I's nothing to worry about. You know that it happens. - While talking she couldn't look in his eyes, afraid that he would see through her lie. She checked the amout of blood, and a sudden dizziness cought her as she sat up to see a little bright red puddle between her legs. Her heart strated to hammer in her chest, and she had to force her breathing to calm down, so Robin won't notice her shock.

Maybe she won't need that potion this time. Though her upcoming agony still made her tremble with fear.

She needed to leave. She needed to leave his chambers, now.

She stood and wrapped a gown around her, as fast as she could, with her vision getting blurry and knees trembling.

- Yes, I know, but you always tell me when it is one of those days, and you didn't warn me this time, so I got worried. - He watched her fighting with her gown's belt, not understanding the sudden change in her mood. - Regina? You know that you still can stay.

She stared back at him, stilling her fingers. If he would even knew the truth. But he won't, ever.

- Eat something, at least. Before you go, please. - He pleaded, stepping closer to her, offering his hand for guidance. He sensed her weakness.

No, no she couldn't stay, soon the cramps will get stronger, and she needed to be alone while it happened.

Panic was written on her face, and Robin got more worried with each passing second.

Before she could turn to leave, she felt the remaining strength leave her body with another gush of blood between her legs, than everything went black.

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Hope you liked it. Please send your thoughts!

Sorry for the cliffhanger!


	3. Chapter 3

Thank you! Thank you, thank you! All of you! :)

Now I just have to live up to your expectations. :)

* * *

When she opened her eyes, she barely saw anything. All she could register was that she was lying in a bed.

There were people around her, speaking, though she couldn't understand what they were talking about. Everything was so blurry, and the room was moving around her. It was quite dark, but after a little time she realised, that she was in her chambers. Robin must have carried her all the way here from his bedchambers after she collapsed.

She blinked a few times and tried to lift her head up a bit from the pillow. She could make out two man standing in the far corner of the room, facing each other. Than her sight travelled to the foot of the bed, where a woman was doing something with great struggle between her parted knees.

The middle-aged woman -wearing dark clothes, her fuzzy face unrecognisable, grey hair in a thight bun - was lifting a red sheet from under the thin blanket -the only thing covering Regina's nudity, than tossed the soaked matrial to the floor.

"There is too much blood." Regina heared her say, and her tears made her vision even more blurry.

She felt the pain, she knew well what was happening to her, and a sob escaped through her parted lips at the realisation. After she saw another deep red rug risen from between her thighs, she had to look away from the woman, not being able to watch any more the nasty job she was doing.

After she let her sight -dimmed from tears- roam around the ceiling for some time -all the while trying to calm her breathing, her eyes found themselfs back on the two man in the corner.

She still couldn't see clearly who they were. But she did hear the worry in the taller one's voice, and she immediately persumed that he was Robin. From what she was able to see and hear in her shaken state, he could as well be Charming, too. Though her hope was strong for him to be no one else, but Robin Hood, who other would be worried about her? And he was the one there when she collapsed, after all.

"Your majesty, it seems worse this time." The woman stopped her movements as she looked sideways to the men.

"Send for Rumpelstiltskin." Robin ordered the other man.

"And the faries?" The smaller man asked, concerned.

"They wouldn't come." Robin explained, disappointment evident in his tone. "Go now! Hurry!" He commanded.

Regina found something confusing in what he said, but she couldn't figure out what it was. She was simply too tired to think. And she would trust Robin to do what was best for her. He was that kind of a man. Not like ..., not like the ... No, she won't think of him, not now, not ever. He was dead, he had been dead for decades. He can't ever hurt her again.

She tried to smile at Robin, reach for him with one of her hands, but she was just too weak to move. Somehow she was grateful for him to be there for her, to care for her. It warmed her already too cold heart. She wanted him to tell her that everything is going to be okay.

It was a rather strange feeling, they must have given her some herbs to make her feel this much at ease, for her walls to be crumbled down complately. She felt free of her burden, like she was floating, and Robin always made her feel like floating.

She could even let him love her, she thought. She could let herself be weak in his arms. He would give her comfort, that of she was sure. He would make her agony bearable, her heart lighter, her mind calmer and her body whole again.

He came so close, though she still coudn't see his precious face, nor his kind eyes.

She wanted to see him, to touch him, but her vision remained unclear, and her body drained.

But why doesn't he come closer to her?

It must be her mistake. She hadn't let him close to her before, she hadn't let him care for her, tend to her.

She should have, she knew it now. Was it too late? She hoped it wasn't. She hoped there still was something good waiting for her.

The other man -or rather boy, according to his quite thin voice- came back, accompanied by someone. Someone with magic, Regina felt it in her bones, though she couldn't see who it was, yet.

She figured it wasn't really important. She will be healed with magic like before. It didn't really matter from who's hands will her misery finally end.

She remembered the only other time she needed magic to stay alive after a severe miscarrige. The only other time, when her baby didn't die from her own hands, from her drinking that potion of death, pain and emptyness.

_It happened when she had enough of her constant suffering, both physical and emotional, when she felt strong enough to act against Rumpelstiltskin's whishes. Or more like, when she got devastated enough to do so._

_After all the pain she endured between these castle walls, after her loneliness -which only grew with every little life she lost- became unbearable, she finally decided to keep her baby. And she was waiting for it's arrival with all the love she had kept locked in herself during the years with Snow and his father._

_She felt the hope getting stronger, becoming almost as real as it was when she and Daniel planned to run away. It seemed like love was a possibility for her after all. No, of course not with the King, but with her unborn child. Hope and love. The baby will bring her both, she thought naively, and she waited to be happy finally._

_Everything looked better than she thought it would ever become. The King got nicer to her with every passing month, Regina could even see the slightly suppressed expectation on him. And as her bump grew, Snow also got more and more excited about having a little brother or sister. It really seemed she could be happy in this castle after all._

_Rumple, on the other hand, wasn't so pleased with her act of rebellion at all. He was angry with her, refused to teach her, which she didn't mind at all. He waited for her to change her mind, to drink the potion in the end. The potion, which he taught her how to make. Because he needed his monster to cast the curse, and a baby would only distract her. But her pain, her suffering made him happier, brought him closer to his goal. That bastard imp._

Her past was so painful, she didn't want to think about it any longer. So she forced her brain to focus on the present. She tried to concentrate harder on what was happening around her, because she found some things confusing, but just couldn't figure out what. She considered her confusions to be due to the loss of blood.

But soon she will be as good as before.

Suddenly she felt a hand on her belly. It made her wake from her momentary doze, which she just realised to be in. She narrowed her eyes to see who it was. She expected it to be Robin. She wanted it to be him. For him to touch her finally. But it wasn't him.

'I'm sorry, deary.' That high-pitched voice always made her uneasy, this time it wasn't any different. But how?

She was able to see now those ugly fingers, ending in sharped nails, resting on her belly. It was definitely him, but how?

He couldn't be here, he was dead.

She was so confused. Body heavy and shaking.

His hand was on her bump, on her _huge_ bump.

_What?_ _No, please don't! _

This was the past. This was her past, which she didn't want to relive.

It was a nightmare, a memory of that only time when she whished her baby to live, but she failed again.

Her breathig increased drastically. She wanted to wake up, but she couldn't, no matter how hard she tried to.

She squeezed her eyes shut, and whished to be with Robin._ Wake up. Wake up. Wakeup._

'You are not meant to be happy, Regina, you should know that by now.' Rumpelstiltskin continued with a smug face.

'How is she? Can you help her?' It was the King's voice, and Regina already knew it would be his. After she became aware of Rumple's presence, she wasn't surprised that it wasn't Robin's face that greated her, as she previously thought it would. As she hoped him to be. No, he was the King, and his worry was not ment for her, but the baby. Never for her.

'Look at me!' The imp's greasy face came too close, as he grabbed Regina's jaw between his fingers forcefully, and looked siriously into her big, frightened eyes. 'Ignore him! You have to listen to me, deary.'

She didn't understand what was he talking about, she was barely conscious, and beside that, an unpleasant feeling started to invade her heart. Fear. Fear of the unknown.

'I am not in your past, I am here in the present, alive, only not completely myself.' He giggled in the end disturbingly.

'It's funny, that when I finally gave up hurting you, your sister appeares from nowhere to take my place.' He told her in his sing-song voice. 'She will make me do things to you, deary, things, that won't be pleasant.' He thought for a moment, as he made a serious face. 'She will use you against the others. Not like she does it with me, no,' and he giggles again, like real psychotic, 'she will hurt you, and everyone you hold dear. And yes, she knows of him, though she doesn't know everything.' He grabbed her face stronger to bring her averting eyes back to meet his yellow ones. 'This is the only way I could speak to you, though I can't tell you what to do. If you could get my dagger, though, that would help a lot. But that's nearly impossible. Anyway, good luck, deary!'

Than he disappeared -while still giggling, along with the King, the neglectful woman and her bedchamber.

* * *

'Welcome back.' Granny greeted her gently, with light voice, like she was talking to a frightened child. And that was how Regina really felt herself when she woke up from her nightmare -which was an unplesant memory, truly. One of those awful ones from her time as Leopold's Queen.

She was still shaky and a bit confused. She expected to see Robin in the room, but he wasn't there. Because he knew she wouldn't let him stay. It was her fault.

The tears slid freely from her eyes to her pale cheeks. It would be so easy to just bury her face in his chest and let him hold her.

But he wasn't there. And maybe it was better this way.

She felt weak and tired, closing her eyes seemed so tempting. She saw Granny trying to hide the pity from her face, with not much succes.

'Your bleeding stopped a little while ago.' Regina's ears started to ring at the older woman's words.

She muffled a sob with one hand while her other grabber her still tight middle. The tears clouding her vision for real now.

It is over than, she thought.

...

* * *

Some new ideas came to me with this story, so maybe it will be a bit longer, than I fist thought. Do you mind it? :)

Thank you, Kris Morene, for the constructive criticism, I used quotation marks instead of hyphens in this chapter. Sorry, in my country, we usually use hyphens. :)


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